You Are Precious In His Sight

Today is one of those days I wish I was waking up and getting ready to walk the mile to church; while on the way staring up at the sky waiting and praying I'll make it there before the downpour of true African rain falls on me.

Today I miss those kids running up to me grabbing my hand with who knows what kind of goo on it and begging for 'and birr' or 'and dabo'.

I miss looking into those little precious eyes and thinking to myself, "do you know how wonderfully made you are and how much the Lord and King of the universe looks down on you and how much his heart leaps for joy in just how beautiful and perfect you are."

I don't think there will ever be a day that I don't miss it.

Thursday morning I found myself sitting on the floor with my coffee in hand and crying to the Today's show 2012 recap. Tears ran down my face as I watched the turmoil and pain that our country and world has had to endure this year. I find myself thinking about this upcoming "fiscal cliff" and the unsettling effect it has on us all. I watched the faces and tears of all those parents who lost their children and the effects of a us embassy be bombed beyond recognition and all the lies and scandals behind it revealed. I watched the country of Syria be divided and live with the day to day sounds of guns and watch people they know be murdered.

As I think back to my time in Ethiopia and now being back in the states my heart is so heavily burdened thinking about how much of this world really doesn't understand just how much they are loved and how no matter what happens, how many regulations we decide to put in to place in our schools, gun control laws we pass, starving third world countries we have or cures we try to find; we have a Lord who is over it all. Who, in this broken world, is the only thing in tact and outside of everything fallen. He reigns on high and simply asks that we live in peace, faith and understanding that he loved us so much he sent his only son and that one day all this turmoil and pain will be no more.

26

Well, I have realized I totally suck at this whole blogging everyday thing.

It's just not me.
I do have a few more songs I want to post about, but in the meantime I'd like to take a minute to share some other thoughts with you.

I have now been alive for 26 years, 2 days, 4 hours and 8 minutes...or something like that.
For those of you who aren't aware, Saturday was my birthday. I'll be honest, I wasn't excited about it what so ever.

I mean seriously. I live in a new city, 7 hours from my best friends, sister and brother. I know NO one, except for my parents and their dog (and now Abby). I have just moved back from living in a third world country for 6 months and still have days I just really don't want to do life.

My days consist of waking up at 630am to this precious face

getting ready for work(if I work that day), catching up on blog posts and finding a new craft project to do. I go to bed at 9 o'clock every night, then just repeat the next day.

I mean I was NOT excited about my birthday what so ever. Actually if I'm being honest, I was angry.

Angry that I live down here now. Angry that I still feel on some days like an alien. Angry that I'm here in the States when my heart is so clearly in Ethiopia and then at the same time angry that I love it here at home and don't want to go back to Ethiopia. Angry that I can't celebrate my birthday with my friends and angry that I don't even know where to go eat for my birthday dinner because I don't really know of any good restaurants around here. Angry that I find it so hard to get to know anyone because when I say I just moved here, and they ask from where, I say Ethiopia and then that's all they want to talk about. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love talking about it. But I don't want to just be defined as that girl that just came back from Ethiopia. 

But as I woke up on the morning of my birthday, I felt like God gave me a swift kick in the you-know-what. I woke up and had two parents who got ready and took me to breakfast at a place with gluten-free pancakes. Then went and spent the morning waiting for me to try on jeans and clothes that they were going to spend way too much money on. All while making dinner reservations at a restaurant on the beach where I got to watch God's majestic-artistic-hand at work with a gorgeous sunset ( and a glass of good red wine). 

I had my two of my best friends send me things in the mail and remind me of just how blessed I am with friendship and the USPS.

I had beautiful flowers (one of my favorite things) sent to me in one of my favorite colors. :)

I was quick to feel God stand there and say, "You want to be angry. YOU want to be angry. Try this and this and oh, I don't know, how about this. Look what I made for you, Amber Hook. Look what I have given you. All because I love you. I created you in your mothers womb perfectly 26 years ago. I picked this day, December 15th for you to be born-even though your grandpa so desperately wanted you to be born on his birthday. You were born to shine my glory and my provision. Anger doesn't shine that, it covers it."

I ended Saturday in tears because it wasn't the birthday I wanted. It was the birthday I needed. I needed that reminder once more of how absolutely BLESSED I am and what exactly I am made for. 

I love that God sees me in my weakness and in my faults and despite my anger still pours out continual blessings upon me. 

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays

Day 13

Okay I realize I'm 5 days behind. Some of that is MIA, some of that is forgetting a day, some of that is just being busy with family here and a puppy and my Dad's Christmas concert(which too bad y'all don't live here because you missed out!) But here I am. Trying to finish out strong and complete every day till Christmas.


Today, today is just one of those songs that will always bring a smile to my face when it comes on.
One of those bands that makes you miss your childhood and makes you laugh so hard when a kid now a days claims it's the best ever, because well, they just have no idea.

Yes, yes I posted this.

And no, there is no shame what so ever.

Song:Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays

I was a lover of Nsync(I had to have something to fill my Hansen void)

I remember in 6th grade being at a Church summer camp(this would be the same day I tried to do a hand stand on the running track in the gym and my hand slip, landing on my head and getting a concussion).

But this day as we were walking around the track a friend of mine had on an nsync tshirt and keep telling me how good of a band they were. 

She ended up giving me their cd and there ya go. I was hooked.

I don't know why they were considered so amazing. 

But they were.

I love this memory and this Christmas song.

Besides Mariah this song can get me up and get me dancing and singing, no problem.

I love the memories it brings back and just the thought of all the blessings I have had and do have in my life.

From being allowed to actually go to a church summer camp, to having friends, to being thankful for health care and an amazing family who loves the Lord.

I'm blessed with having a job right now and a house to live in and for being able to celebrate freely and with the full knowledge of what the birth of our savior means.

Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men

Day 7: I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day-Casting Crowns


If you've heard this song, you know why it's a good one.

First off, I'm not the biggest Casting Crowns fan. But the way they do this song is awesome.
I'm a sucker for a good drum line and violin arrangement.

But this song gets me for another reason. This song was written by a man named Henry Longfellow during a time when his oldest son decided to join the Union as a solider without his father's consent. While this may not seem like a big deal, just a kid doing a typical thing and disobeying, it was. During his service he was severely injured at the same time Longfellow lost his wife in an accidental fire.

I believe he wrote this song in a moment of darkness. In a moment of despair and pain, longing for some sort of hope of peace

I feel like even though this was written almost 150 years ago it applies to so much of today.
How many people go through this season of Christmas in pain? How many don't know God personally but hold on to this hope that there is peace and joy at the end of everything? How many keep trying to find contentment in the perfect present? And how many of us aren't sharing the message, that there IS hope. There is joy and there is peace. That the bells do ring and the choirs to sing. And when that time comes it's going to be glorious and more amazing then we could ever imagine it will be. We have the perfect present, it's simply a matter of accepting it then sharing it.

Shall I Play My Drum?

Day 6: Drummer Boy


Have you ever had the chance to watch a young child interact with a baby?

Babies are just drawn to younger kids. I've had so many mothers tell me their baby laughs the most when their older brother or sister gets down to play with them. I don't know why, but I love it.

This is the image I get when I hear this song The Little Drummer Boy.

I get this image of this young boy. This boy who wants to grow up so much and be a part of the group of people who are going to see this baby whom everyone claims is the King. The one who will save the world.
I imagine this boy who plays this drum and runs around sneaking into private meetings of wise men. He over hears what they say about baby Jesus and knows this baby is someone really important. He finds out that they are traveling to go meet the baby and bring him gifts, but he has nothing to bring.

So he decides, I'll give him everything I can. I can play a song.

As they make the journey he practices and practices. Until they get there. He sees the baby. He watches the wise men make their way to the baby and leave the gifts, then it's just him.

Chest out, drum in his lap, he looks at Mary and asks if he can play. She slightly nods her head and he begins. He keeps his head down concentrating and at the end looks up. Straight into the eyes of baby Jesus.
The whole room is watching. Watching this young boy play everything he has for this baby, the King. As he finishes his song a smile comes across Jesus's face.

The young boy lights up. With all the satisfaction and joy very few will ever feel. That feeling of giving absolutely everything for this King and feeling the contentment and love from the Savior and Messiah. The Lord of Lords and King of Kings. That feeling that nothing else matters in the world.

That's what we are called to live for. To simply bring glorification to Christ. To lay everything down at his feet, no matter how small it is.

Day 4 & 5

no, i didn't forget yesterday.

just wanted to combine two days together because for me, they have the same meaning.

Song: Angels We Have Heard on High and Hark! The Herald Angels Sing


I love these songs for many reasons, but especially the picture it plays in my mind of that night.
The night of this little precious baby boy being born and the heaven opening up and just filling the night sky with their voices radiating.

What an amazing sound that must of been.
It's kind of like watching the end of a Mighty Ducks movie and you know the ending, but while he skates with the puck down the ice in slow motion, you have this deep down-feel good-make you want to stand on your feet and clap type music playing and you can't help but smile. There's a twinge of "what if he doesn't make it?" going through your mind. But then you have the battle of over coming that with, "oh yeah, he's going to make it."

I feel like that's how it was for the angels.

To watch it all play out. To look at this precious sweet virgin birth baby boy and to rejoice with singing "Glory! To the new born King!" and knowing, he's going to make it and it's going to be awesome!

Day 3- Slow Down Sista

Day 3-

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas- Frank Sinatra edition


I mean Frank. You can't go wrong with Frank. Ever.

I love this song for so many reasons. I love the reminder it brings to embrace and slow down during the Christmas season.

It doesn't talk about running around getting the most perfect gift. It doesn't talk about wishing for snow.
It just talks about realizing the friends around you and spending time enjoying Christmas.

For me it's a reminder of slowing down and remembering...wait for it....the real reason for this season. Bada Bing cheesy cliche line!

But really. It helps me slow down and just focus on the Lord. On remembering the gift of salvation and the promise that was being fulfilled on that night. The reminder of humbleness and using something so small for such a big task.

25 Days of Christmas-Friendship

Day 2:

Today is probably one of my top 10 favorite Christmas songs. Purely for the memories behind it.

Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas"











There's only one thing that comes to mind when this song comes on...and it's usually to text my friend Susan right away to let her know i'm listening to it, or to film me singing it and sending it to her. Yes, I'm a dork. But the best part is I know she'll do the same thing-so we're dorks together.

She's been one of my closest best friends for over 13 years.

We still crack up about the way we met. She remembers me on stilts and I remember her climbing out of her van in overalls, crazy curly hair and no shoes.

She knows my highs and my lows-and thankfully still loves me despite them.

One look and we know EXACTLY what the other one is thinking.

We often just talk in quotes from movies or the tv show friends. And for us, that's all the conversation we need.

She's seen me at my worst and encouraged me to be my best.

She's been the one to pray for me and hold secrets I merely couldn't trust anyone else to keep. 

She's one of the very few people I can actually go to a sporting event with-and that's saying A LOT.

We have Ruth and Naomi kind of friendship. The kind of friendship where you no longer really consider yourselves friends but family.

I'm thankful for the gift God gave me in bringing her into my life 13+ years ago. 

So even though this song isn't necessarily geared toward baby-Jesus-in-a-manger type of Christmas, it's geared to the reminder of how blessed I am by God.

How blessed I am with this amazing gift of friendship and the glorifying radiance of Christ we try to exude in it. 

25 Days of Christmas

Well it's December 1st.

15 days till one of the best days of the year-and if you're counting on your fingers and shaking your head saying, "that's not when Christmas is." Well, you're right. That's my birthday... :)

But the other best day is only 24 days away and I've decided to spend the next 25 days picking out my favorite Christmas songs and sharing a little about why they're my favorite.

Day 1- Do You Hear What I Hear (Carrie Underwood version)

To be honest, this song didn't quite hit me like it should till I looked up the meaning. Most of the time I would sit around and belt it out like I was Carrie. Then I found out that this song was actually written during the Cuban Missile crisis-but yet I still sing it like I'm Carrie Underwood.
It was written during a time where there was very little hope and there was fear surrounding many that their lives were over. That the world as they knew it was just pure evil and every situation had one ending-the end.

Noel Regney wrote the lyrics to this song in his head while out walking. Every person who passed him had a frown on their face until he passed two ladies walking their babies. A glimpse of these babies smiling at each other filled his heart with poetry. They reminded him of newborn lambs. Thus, the song begins, "Said the night wind to the little lamb..." He went straight home and had his wife write the music to accompany it. They were quoted saying, "We couldn't even sing it, through; it broke us up. We cried and cried."

I can't help but love this song even more. It's a perfect example of the world we live in today. Even though we aren't facing the immediate threat of nuclear missiles, we are faced with the lack of peace and joy, famine and poverty.

We as Christians don't pray for peace for people everywhere like we should be and don't rest in the hope and promise of goodness and light.

I love that this song is a reminder of that. Of the gift of salvation, peace, joy, goodness and light that was brought to us on that night.

Thanksgiving

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. You know what that means... only one more day till dancing to Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas" and decking the halls like crazy!

I got so excited, I sort of broke my rule of nothing Christmas before Thanksgiving and decided to let the craftiness take over.
I saw this sign and this quote has been repeating its self over and over in my head. I just absolutely love it.

So I set out to make it for the fireplace for Christmas ((had to have the puppy within viewing range))

 Got my wood cut at Lowes-thankfully didn't look like a rookie this time around

Got my stain picked out and asked the guy for tips. This was the only one I got, "don't be intimidated."



I might have developed a little obsession with staining by the way....

I made sure to test one of the scrap pieces to make sure I didn't screw the whole thing up. Just brushed it on and wiped it off with an old sock

 I cracked the garage for some ventilation and turned on my Matt Kearney Pandora and went to town.

You know what they say about watching paint dry... or maybe that's boiling water-either way, we took a nap around here.
 

 Then I set out and got my text all planned out on my computer and printed it out.

After a TON of research I combined a couple ideas and finally decided to use chalk to get the outline on the wood. I just rubbed the back then took a ballpoint pin and traced my outline.

 I took the scrap "practice" piece and made sure I liked the way it worked. 

Gotta add a little touch of red

 Well an hour and a half later we had a sign. I only had one little mistake that with some quick action I was able to fix (problem with using acrylic paint)

 Then I had to attach the small 1x4's to the back to keep it sturdy and attach all the planks-good thing my grandpa-the handyman-is in town. The guy at Lowes cut my wood wrong and we had to fix it. Plus apparently there is a whole science to screwing in screws. I can now say I got it down. My grandpa even told me I did a perfect job. (just 4 mistakes...and he quickly taught me how to remove a stripped screw)

 This is the back:

Make sure to stagger the top two screws and reverse the stagger on the bottom two.

I still can't get over how much I love the sign and the reminder of just how humble Christ is.

 To send His one and only Son and have him be born in a place where animals eat and poop.

Tomorrow is a day dedicated to remembering that message and be Thankful for the life I live because of that little stable.  

God's Hot Mess

It's been almost one month since I've opened up and poured out my soul for the world wide web to read-okay that was a tad on the dramatic side and I blame it on the amounts of gossip girl I've been watching. (**judge all you want on that one**)

But I feel like not a whole lot has changed in the last month. I mean other than the obvious- I got a job and I feel like a mother with a newborn.

Let me pause to introduce Abby. The little "princess" that I seem to love and hate multiple times a day.

She turns 10 weeks old today and for the last 3 weeks I have seen more poop, pee and said "no" more times then I'd like to count.

But she's a smarty. She sleeps through the night (as of 2 days ago) and has already learned how to sit, shake, lay down, "leave it"and what cookie means.

I'm proud of her and love her to death.

Okay, I promise that was it.

for now...

I've started working. 

I love it. 

I get paid to craft and well, if you know me, you know that I couldn't have found a better job.

I love the people I work with and the people I get to help be creative with.

I've been reading a lot and just started a new book.

I'm only about 40 pages in. But so far she's had me laughing and saying "amen!"

(never a bad start)

I had 4 friends come down and visit last weekend.

Gosh did I need it.

I needed the dancing, disneyland, laughing, "hey girl/boy"ing, not kayaking, picture taking and just all around fellowshiping.

I'll admit, I cried when they left. I've realized how much I've missed having close relationships down here. It's so easy to get caught up in day to day life and not realize how much you need community. It's easy for me to go to church on Sundays alone and just slip in, then slip out.

I didn't realize how absolutely terrified I am to go meet people till I felt that void when they left.

I'm not scared I'll be "lonely" forever. I'm just realizing I can't push that fear to the back of my head and yet let it consume my every move.

I can't be sad that I'm not meeting people because I haven't really prayed that I will. (thank you Brian for that reminder...)

I have great friends. I have a great life. 

God has provided abundantly more then I could imagine at the exact times I've needed it.

I may not be on the same mission field as I was in Ethiopia, but I'm on a mission to find God here and now. 

I'm on a mission to be a woman of God (not a Godly woman). 

If I'm going to be a hot mess, it'll be God's hot mess radiating His glory.

Cute as a button

I know it's been awhile since I've posted a blog.

Frankly, I've just been busy and a little overwhelmed with the amount of things I want to write about. Mostly because I'm afraid they'd come out extremely passive aggressive; down fall of post-missionary lifestyle. It's crazy how you can spend 6 months loving on strangers halfway around the world, but have the hardest time being understanding and compassionate to those who are in your immediate life.

Which is why I've decided to change up my blog for today and post about something I'm grateful for. I feel the more things I acknowledge gratitude for the more I work on being understanding and compassionate.

One of the things I've realized I'm most grateful for lately is for the ability to craft. Yes craft. I love it. I have always loved art, I have always loved being creative and most of all I've always loved using my stubbornness to make things for less.

I've been working on trying to make my room... "home". I moved down with my parents to a new city when I got back and it was a hard adjustment, still is actually. So I've tried to make my room over and a place that I can go and just have some "me and God" time.
I found this really adorable headboard that I absolutely loved...but really didn't love the price. (even though it's now $100 less then when I first found it)

So I set out to make it for less. 

I followed this tutorial from little green notebook and loved it!

This was my end result:

I ended up spending only $75... take that world market!

Here's a couple step by steps if you want to take a look!

I loved making all these buttons-even if my thumb was killing me after. They're surprisingly easier to make then I thought too.

I just bought 1/8 of a yard of each fabric at joanns and have a ton left over. 

 This was my bed before:

All the supplies to get started!

I got my foam at Joanns as well (make sure to take a coupon with you-it'll save you a ton of money)

They'll cut it to the length you want right there at the store.

Had to figure out all the measurement for the amount of buttons I wanted to add and marked it off with chalk.

PS-in case you haven't noticed yet, I used pegboard instead of plywood. no drilling holes and about half the price! $15 at lowes-can't beat that! especially if it's a little damaged like mine, I got half off. Plus they'll cut it right there in the store to the appropriate dimensions and you get to take the rest home for whatever else you want to use it for. I really had to try and not look like a rookie while I was there and actually ended up having an awesome conversation with a guy about how God used me while I was in Ethiopia. Love those kinds of moments!

 Then took a permanent marker and marked all the holes to make the tufting easier

I forgot to take a picture but I actually cut out these little holes with a paring knife so that the buttons sunk down in and made the tufting look even better!

 Then you get to glue! (make sure you take it outside and lay your board on newspaper, otherwise you'll have little glue dots on your concrete)

 Lay out your batting and fabric on the front-it doesn't have to be pulled tight or wrinkle free.

 Indy wanted in on the action.

 Then add your button and pull as tight as you can, then staple all different ways to keep it nice and tight

this is what the back will end up looking like

Then pull tight starting in the middle and staple out making sure to do the sides last.

I bought 2 legs to help stand up my headboard instead of keeping the full sheet of pegboard intact. 

I drilled two holes for the screws.

 then wrapped the legs in extra fabric I had to "camouflage" them

 Add the legs and there you go!

I'm absolutely in love with it. 4.5hours of pain and sweat was well worth it.